Inner monologue
by Amethyst Jewels
Summary: Our favorite hero reflecting on her life, her friends & her duties. AU-ish (still in character, just different series pulled together).


Hello readers! OMG, so much has happened since the last time I posted a story! I got married, had a baby (Max will be 9 months old December 17th!) & I'm gonna be a graduate again come the 19th! I love how no matter how much life changes, I always come back to writing Sailor Moon fanfiction. What can I say, it's deeply engrained in my subconscious.

This came out of the blue 2 days ago but I'm glad because I felt the need to write. I didn't know what it would be but this little ficette (short fanfic) takes place during Sailor Moon R (season 2 in the US). It's an AU because I borrowed some elements from the live action show too but it's mainly the Anime. Enjoy!

***_SM_***

Life can truly suck. People severely misunderstand me! I'm sure every teenage girl says that but it's the truth! If people only knew the fate of the world is literally in my hands more days than I care to count. I miss my carefree days but what I do now is way more important than shopping, videogames & boys.

I'm a real life superhero! Ok, you can stop laughing now! I'm serious. I fight evil by moonlight & win love by daylight….ok, I'm working on the love part but only because he's a forgetful jerk right now. I go to junior high during the day while doing the love part.

I don't fight alone however. No one can do this by themselves. I have four friends who are like sisters to me. We go way back…like a millennium back.

Ami is the shiest & the quietest of us all but she's a fierce fighter when it counts. When a group of babies were being attacked, her anger unlocked a brand new power*! None of us had ever done that before. And she fought to save the man she loved from the Negaverse when he was one of the monsters we were looking for, even when he wanted to die thinking it was best for her & everyone else's safety.

Ami is embarrassed to admit it but she really loves music & idols. She doesn't want to be seen as a typical teenage girl so she hides it. I wish she wouldn't rely on other people's opinions so much! She's too intelligent for that but she's humble. You can make friends & still be smart. One day she will break out of that shell & surprise us all!

Makoto is a strong & self-sufficient girl; unfortunately these attributes are born from personal tragedy. She lost her parents in a plane crash when she was little. After being in foster care for a few years, she became an emancipated minor & lived on her own. Most kids would go buck wild at that opportunity but not her. She's a dedicated student & protector. She has a reputation of being a "karate maniac" & has been suspended from schools but only because she was defending herself or others. Mako-chan is tall for her age & some guys poke fun of her for it, but her spirit never waivers.

She may be the tomboy of the bunch but Mako-chan is a fierce cook & flower arrangement wiz! Once she's done with school, she plans on opening up a flower shop & a bakery. I know who's in charge of my wedding! Well…whenever the fool up & remembers!

Minako is a sweetheart & not a typical celebrity. She attends regular school when she's not filming her TV show, Sailor V, or recording her music. You know the badass volleyball captain on the court? Yep, that's her! You wouldn't have guessed it, huh? Fame hasn't corrupted her one bit. Whenever you need something, just say the word and she's there. Like once when Mako-chan was sick, Mina did all the grocery shopping & errands that week so she could rest & do her homework & spent time with her while we were in class since her schedule is more flexible than ours. Mako-chan did the cooking herself however. After that finger cutting fiasco, we don't let Mina anywhere near a kitchen!

Mina & I are so much alike, people mistake us for sisters**. We went shopping downtown once & the store was surrounded by fans when we were finished. I decided to be a good friend & take the heat off of her by wearing her clothes & running out so she can go out unnoticed. People chased me thinking I was Minako the idol! They all left in a huff when I wrote my own name in an autograph though. Little do they know how famous I am….or will be. Give it time!

Rei comes off as abrasive, cold & mean but you can't take it to heart. She's just been through a lot. Her mother died when she was a kid & her father is a politician, so she rarely sees him. Living with her grandfather in the temple made her a very dedicated priestess & caretaker, but she was very lonely because shallow girls spread rumors & were superstitious (Rei's enhanced abilities come in very handy during battles & when she's doing meditation). She's not quick to love or be a friend to you, but when she does, it's steadfast & forever loyal. Rei does things with her whole heart. She will never let you go or let you down.

Did I mention Rei has a phenomenal singing voice? She writes her own songs & we suspect she'll be just as famous as Mina one day but for right now, she has her heart set on singing for one special guy. She just refuses to admit it's true!

As for me…Well, I could be better. I know I'm a piece of work. I don't get the best grades in school but it's not for lack of trying, I swear! But I have my friends to help me (well most of them. Rei still thinks I'm trying to use them so I can go out & party. Ok like once but I did do the homework, just the wrong one. It's the thought that counts right?!). I daydream a lot but only because I'm reminiscing of days past & the days yet to come. I have to be mindful of the task set before me but I need to find myself in all this too.

It's like I'm living two lives in one body. I'm the immature school girl who apparently has nothing going for her & then I'm this warrior princess predestined to save the world, find her love & one day rule? I don't know which part scares me most. I can't choose but I can't be both at the same time. At some point or another, I'm pulled in a different direction. Some days I have the desire to run away from it all; other days are filled with making contingency plans to defeat what forces I've been sent to battle.

I won't give up

I won't give in

I will never lose

I am _Usagi Tsukino_

I am **Sailor Moon**

***_SM_***

It's just a little something something, but I hope you like it! At the end of the day, Usagi is a teenager girl but she has a lot to deal with. I hope this piece reflects on that! I wrote it to be interpreted as a one on one conversation or a diary entry. :) I'm a few weeks early but since it's unlikely something new will pop up between now & the end of the year, I wish you all a very MERRY CHRISTMAS & a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

*The power I'm talking about was in the 7th episode of SMR called "Mamoru and Usagi's Babysitting Mayhem" or "Much Ado About Babysitting" in the US. It was Mercury Ice Bubbles Freeze. That was the first time Mercury used it & she only used it a few times after that. That was epic! Did anyone else freak out when they first saw it?!

**And yeah, if you don't know, Minako & Usagi do look similar because Sailor V's purpose is to protect Sailor Moon. That's why she wore a Tiara at first & everyone thought she was the Princess. If you didn't know, you can't get mad at me for spoiling it for you. Sailor Moon is 20 years old this year so that fact is old! XD


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